HAPPY HALLOWE'EN!

What do you get when you cross Bambi with a ghost?

BamBoo!

SO SORRY

So sorry I've been remiss in my postings but I've had to focus on other things for the time being. I'll be back :-) Perhaps I'll tell you of another dream I had ...

THE DREAM

Had a dream about connecting with the masculine last night. It was so erotic, I woke up horny and in my half-sleep, I reached over and started caressing my husband who was sound asleep. I reached over from my side of the bed in my state of slumber just to find him and connect with him. What a wonderful feeling it was to go from a surrealistic dream state to a very real, intensely physical experience!

The Dream ... A young man, on a train, in a restaurant, in a classroom, and in a bedroom in a house with many rooms, in love with me and wanting to make love to me. Don't confuse this image with anything external ... it's not about a male outside of me, but the inner masculine. A young man, alive and focused on me ... a symbol for the young masculine energy within me wanting to connect with the mature feminine. The erotic images are about life's libido: the love of, lust for life.

And the Physical Reaction ... SO hot! While I was hesitant at first to acknowledge the desire to connect, I became so aroused by the perserverence of the young man--and I have to describe him as that. He wasn't a mature man, but neither was he a boy. He was a young man who knew the value of a wise woman--a crone.

And Reality ... He reached over and rubbed the insides of my thighs with his hand, teasing me. I opened my legs and moved my body to motion for him that I wanted him--I just had to have his cock. He climbed on top of me and I guided his cock into the darkness of the warm, wet passage that led to the inner sanctum.

I'll have to get back to the details later (maybe--I'm preoccupied with living life lately, rather than writing about it), but in the end he came--deep down the back of my throat. I have begun to realize how Linda Lovelace could say she though her clit must be located at the back of her throat that's why she liked deep throating so much. And I love having my lover/husband thrust his cock down the back of my throat and across my tongue. I love to feel every ridge and every vein of his hard cock in my mouth and caress it with my tongue. And be in my face, up close and personal.

But I was still horny and he had cum and I couldn't get enough! So I continued by manipulating my clit with my fingers until I came ... and I came ... and came ... and came. I lost count somewhere in the teens but my body could not get enough of the sensation of manipulating my clit so that I came again and again and again. By the time I had to stop--and only because I had to stop because it was now morning and he wanted to do some running around (bummer!)--my fingers were so wet they were wrinkled, just like they are when you've stayed too long in the water ...

MY WORK OF ART ...

is the Eden I have created here, in this space. For my family: my two beautiful children and my husband. A haven. Sometimes I may lose sight of what my purpose is, but when I remind myself to take it in and to breathe ... deeply, I realize this is my heaven ... A place of love and acceptance ... and of peace.

The peace to be myself ... totally ... completely ... including my highs and lows ... my light and my shadow ... the Saint and the Sinner.

THE BREEZE BRUSHES AGAINST MY SKIN

As I sit here naked in front of the blank slate, I feel the breeze of the fan overhead brush against my skin. And it's cyclical. Perhaps the blades are ever so impercetibly tilted differently enough to cause the fan to circulate unevenly. The breeze wafts over me in waves.

My lover comes to me and says "Did you notice I moved the fax?"

O.K., I think to myself.

"Yes, I did."

We had talked about moving it from my office into his office on the third floor for quite sometime now but each time he took the telephone cable to be wired correctly for the four lines coming into the house to have the fax respond to the correct incoming line, some incompetent bastard would get it wrong. So it's finally out of my space and where it will be of more use.

"Do you feel like spreading your legs and having your holes filled? And your nipples squeezed?" he says as he bends over me and kisses me with an open mouth and intent lips. I lean back and take in his kisses and the thought of what it will feel like and decide that I'll write about our last lovemaking session another time. For now, I've got something else to attend to. :-)

IT'S RAINING AGAIN!

It's pouring rain ... for the second day in a row. And it's wonderful!

SUCCESS

I've had a satori moment today
after moping around and
kicking myself
wallowing in my "woe me"
and pity tea.

I've realized
that how the story ends
is up to me.

And if all I ever accomplish
is to help those I love
have a happy life
and enjoy myself while I'm at it,
I will have been a success.
:-)

ON EROTICA

Freedom and Peter Pan are erotic: passionate about what they're doing. Coming from different perspectives, they still get it--it's erotic to give in to the passion and go with it whether it's being a rich jerk or someone who's getting in touch with the unconscious: to honor the call of life's libido, the one that leads to individuation--to be in touch with your inner power.

IT FEELS GOOD TO KNOW ...

after over 10 years of being with him, he says to me "See what you do to me every time I kiss you." And I reach down ... and he feels sooo goood ...

YOU KNOW YOU'RE GETTING OLD WHEN ...

You know you're getting old when ...
you say after he rolls off you after a hot and heavy session, doggy style, and you've wedged your head up against the headboard stuffed with pillows and your body has been banged down lower and lower on the bed, "Ah, honey ... would you put my legs back together for me?"!

I LOVE TO RUN MY FINGERS THRU HIS HAIR

Standing over him while he's trying to focus on finishing his task ... I take my hands and run my fingers through his hair until my palms are flat against his head. Then I draw my fingers back across his scalp, allowing his silken strands to slide between my skin and his, cascading like a waterfall, filling up the void left by gathering the hair in one spot. And I keep doing this until I have had my fill of him in my hands. And then I kiss him and leave, knowing I have sewn the seeds for passionate interludes between the mundane but necessary tasks of ordinary existence.

AS IN ALL THINGS ...

I try ...
as in all things ...
sometimes I win
sometimes I lose.
Mostly, though,
I come out on top
in the end.

SUNNY AND 76 DEGREES

How could I possible envy anyone else when life is so good ... oh mitaki 'ahsin HO!

Riding bikes
to the park
and playing
and racing home again

Baking bread
and knitting
and lounging
nude
on the deck ...
and dozing ...
and writing

GOING DEEP

It's still warm enough to sleep naked. But then, it's always warm enough to sleep naked! :-) More importantly, though, it's still warm enough to go naked in the house and outside when the sun has warmed the air. The mornings are getting crisp and I will have to wear something in my ear to protect it from the cold air rushing in and causing my nerve endings to scream at me. My ear, when cold air is forced into it from the wind rushing into it when I'm moving quickly, starts to hurt. So when I run or ride in the cold air from fall through spring, I must put something in my ear to protect it from being infiltrated by the bitterness of the icy air. It started to hurt yesterday while I was riding so I know that I will be hibernating and going deep soon.

Winter is a good time to go deep. And I go deep ... deep into my psyche ... to see what's there ... testing the metal ... what am I made of ... and forgiving myself when, in the blink of an eye, I plunge into to deep, dark chasms and slide down to the depths and but for a single strand connecting me to the light, I would drown. So I pull myself back from the depths, by that single strand of light ... until I can exhale.

I enjoy taking him deep ... deep down the back of my throat ... like last night after coming back from watching Kevin Nealon at the comedy club ... I was lying on my back, sideways on the bed and he pulled me to the edge of it and let my head dangle over the side. He stood over me and leaned over and put his mouth on my pussy. As he bent over me, his cock dangled in my face so I took him in my mouth ... and began to suck. And it was good ... to feel him grow and enlarge as I used more suction to help draw the blood to his cock. As he licked and sucked my clit, it too became engorged ... I began sucking harder. And as his cock grew and I got hotter, I wanted him deeper ... deeper in my mouth and down the back of my throat. From where he stood, he could give me what I wanted--pushing his penis deeper down my throat as I moved my head so I could feel him .. deeper ... further ... more ... and he flicked the clips securely attached to my nipples and I winced from the stimulation as my groin reacted to it.

EARLY OCTOBER SUN

Lounging naked in the
early October sun
touching my body.
Feeling my fingers
as they caress
my silken skin.
Noticing the wind
brush past my wet lips
and cool my face
made hot from
reading erotica
reminds me
how it is
to be
in my own skin

My husband comes to the door to see if I still want to go see Kevin Nealon at the comedy club. I motion to him to come outside closer to me. "You've gotten some sun." And I think to myself the book must be doing its job because the sun has been behind the trees all afternoon. I am flush from thinking about sex and my face and chest have turned red from thoughts of wet women and hard penises. Of hot, lusty, sexual animals engaged in wanton acts of copulation so intent on minimizing the gap between the male and female anatomy, they think about little else ... overcome by the drive toward ecstacy.